T here is a worrying global trend in parenting these days that isn't easily explainable. When you think critically about it, there's a strong reason to believe that society, by forging a footloose population, is reaping more than it bargained for. It might just be that someone, or something greater than us, is misleading us on; so as to guide us to his or its desired direction. With that regard, I am not asking you to simply believe my theories. All I’m requesting is that we consider these possibilities and seek out the truth.

I once found myself waiting at a bus stop one late evening. There were ten or so people at the bus stage, when some drunken youth joined us. As we waited for the bus, the youth began arguing and soon resorted to fighting. What amazed me, is that the ten adults at the bus stage—myself included—looked on, mildly concerned. It was like we were hoping their parents would suddenly appear and discipline them.

As we watched, a bus arrived and most of us, including the youth, boarded it. It was while the bus conductor was collecting the fares that the youth got incensed again. This time, the arguing involved the conductor. The bus conductor had grown suspicious of the rowdy youth and demanded the fare from them first; which ended up infuriating them instead. While the arguing went on, the youth reached their destination and requested the bus driver to stop. That's when the scuffle got physical. The bus conductor and driver had sensed a ploy and weren't taking any more nonsense. In the five minutes that it took, the conductor had his shirt torn, tempers had flared and insults had been hurled here and there.

Some lady eventually offered to pay for the youth and brought the commotion to an abrupt end. And that's when I got really infuriated. The very act of paying for the youth, according to me, had done more damage to the situation than help it. Not that the fighting was right. But by paying for the youth, we had just missed a golden opportunity to give the youth an abject lesson on how to behave in public.

Just a few months ago, some young gangsters had car-jacked and shot-dead a top medical professor, in the same manner that Lucky Dube was murdered: leaving his family, colleagues and country men at great a loss. The professor was a leading light in the AIDS vaccine research and was widely acclaimed for his efforts. A few gunshots later and he was taken away from us. Probably, all the gangsters got was a cell phone and some few notes for their wretched effort! The same gangsters were later felled by police, leading to more distress and loss to contend with. Now I’m pretty sure these gangsters are also affected by AIDs, one way or another. So what a folly they committed!

In the month of June 2008, over three hundred schools in my country were hit by unrests which saw students disrupt learning, by setting school property on fire as a way of raising their concerns.

Many others had to be closed due to the high tension among the students. In one incident a boy in one of the schools was actually found with three liters of petrol, a box of matches and a sweater that had been soaked in petrol; with the intention of committing a felony. Others were caught in time and charged with breaking window panes and generally being disobedient. Many other schools were able to save the situation in the nick of time by sending the kids home indefinitely.

Solutions have been floated around. But the problem is still not being recognized by all and sundry yet. I'm not a parent yet but I know raising a kid is like holding a dove in your hand. You squeeze it too hard and you crush it. Hold it too loosely and you risk it flying away.

According to the school heads' association, in my country, the indiscipline recently witnessed in schools had grown to unmanageable levels. Some of the reasons given by them for the trend included the law, which through the children's act, passed in 2001, outlawed corporal punishment. The other reason cited was that parents were giving too much freedom to their children. Lack of role models of high moral integrity in society was also cited.

They noted that children are now accompanying their parents to adult entertainment joints, where they were exposed to a new kind of teaching. Parents were also accused of ineffective parent involvement in their kid’s life. They were guilty of spending so much time on their careers and leaving their children in the hands of house-helps, babysitters and peers; who often lack the authority and the skill to steer the kids in the right direction.

Why then, are we shocked at what these kids are doing in the three hundred or so schools? Or why do the recent school shootings in the US shock us?

In a recent study by an organization by the name “Africa Mental Health Foundation,” credence was given to concerns over run-away indiscipline. Their findings showed that school children—in my country—as young as eleven were falling prey to drug abuse. These findings linked up with media reports— produced sometime back—that certain shops, close to schools, were lacing sweets with drugs to make children develop a dependency on them; and were thus to be demolished. They were, apparently, recycling chewing-gum and lacing them with drugs. The study warned of major economic costs and loss of the country's workforce, if urgent and stringent measures were not taken to curb the trend. The report also backed up the blame on parents who dumped their children in schools and didn't follow-up on their kids' in-disciplinary cases.

These “kids gone wild incidences” are not the preserve of kids in my country though. There are many global instances of poor parenting. But few are seeing how it is affecting the future of man as a species on this Earth. It is sad to say, but some Superior Being could be using this phenomenon against us. The end result might mean well but the method might be painful; simply because we refuse to take the short cuts like perfoming the "The Grand Counter Test."

 

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